Tonight’s episode opens with Bangie talking about taking Jackson on a single date and I’m confused because Osher didn’t announce the single date and I NEED OSHER. They’re walking along a beach and are then picked up on a helicopter by TOUCHDOWN HELICOPTERS, which just makes my dating life seem povo AF. Bangie talks about… Continue reading Bachie Recap – Season 5, Episode 3
Category: Uncategorized
The Bachelorette Recap: Season 5, Episode 2
Tonight’s episode opens with Bachie-Angie (Bangie??) in a Mustang looking bougey AF which is a far cry from the piece of tin I Fred-Flinstone around Melbourne. She’s talking about how Carlin gives her the feels and there’s a recap of the song he sang for her and I don’t know why it was used as… Continue reading The Bachelorette Recap: Season 5, Episode 2
The Bachelorette Recap: Season 5, Episode 1
There’s an opening montage of Angie watching The Bachelorette from her time on Gogglebox judging people and her talking about her new journey to find love. Angie’s Dad says he doesn’t want her to end up with someone from NSW because they can’t play State of Origin…except that they’ve won for the last two years,… Continue reading The Bachelorette Recap: Season 5, Episode 1
Bachie Recap – Season 7 Episode 14
Tonight’s episode opens with shirtless Bachie talking about how excited he is for hometown week which is a total lie, because no one in the history of the world has ever been excited to meet the in-laws. Ever. First up is Abbie’s hometown in Brisbane. Bachie says he’s stoked to be in Brisbane and we’ve hit… Continue reading Bachie Recap – Season 7 Episode 14
Bachie Recap – Season 7 Episode 12
Tonight’s episode opens with Bachie driving his HYUNDAI to pick up Helena and spruiks the shit outta this thing. Like, they’re just not even being subtle anymore. They arrive at a nondescript field to find a wooden timeline board where Bachie reveals that they will be mapping out their future milestones together. Bachie’s excited for… Continue reading Bachie Recap – Season 7 Episode 12
Bachie Recap – Season 7 Episode 11
Tonight’s episode opens with the girls gushing over a large box in the lounge room. Some of the girls suggest it could be a puppy and THERE’S NO AIR HOLES, SO IT CAN’T BE A PUPPY, GOSH. They open the box to find heaps of baby shower paraphernalia and give each other mad side eye… Continue reading Bachie Recap – Season 7 Episode 11
Bachie Recap – Season 7 Episode 10
Tonight’s episode opens with the girls gushing over how many of Bachie’s girlfriends have gone home. Osher arrives and leaves a date card, which says Mary, Abbie, Helena, Ellie and Emma will be joining Bachie on some sort of potential tightrope situation and the girls are going on about how much fun it will be… Continue reading Bachie Recap – Season 7 Episode 10